Help me out - feeling embarrassed
Find out more about feeling a bit awkward or embarrassed.
Cringe!
Embarrassment is our natural reaction to uncomfortable situations that happen in front of others. It鈥檚 that cringing feeling that most of us get when something awkward happens and you feel like everybody is looking at you. Everyone feels embarrassed sometimes, and there鈥檚 nothing wrong with that. But it can become a problem if it stops you doing things you want to do. So how do we deal with embarrassment?
What makes us embarrassed?
Lots of things can be embarrassing 鈥 it could be something unexpected, like tripping up in front of the entire class. It could be because of an awkward or mean remark someone鈥檚 made 鈥 especially if that makes other people laugh. It could be that you don鈥檛 feel confident at something, like playing football or speaking up in class 鈥 and that stops you from doing it.
Puberty can also be embarrassing, when your body and brain goes through lots of changes that can be difficult to talk about. It can be especially hard if you experience those changes later or earlier than other people.
Chavala talks about feeling embarrassed
What does it feel like?
You might blush if you鈥檙e embarrassed, and then feel all hot and bothered. You might go quiet or find it hard to speak. You might feel shy or even want to run away from the situation you鈥檙e in. You may even feel like crying. The good news is that we can learn to deal with embarrassment.
Dr Aaron talks about feeling awkward about body changes
Tips for dealing with feeling embarrassed
Remember that we鈥檙e all embarrassed at some point. It鈥檚 important to try to accept it, shrug your shoulders, and move on. Sometimes it even helps to laugh at yourself!
Don鈥檛 be ashamed to talk about it. Speak to someone about what happened; you鈥檒l probably find your friends feel the same way and will share their embarrassing stories with you.
Don鈥檛 let a previous embarrassment stop you from trying something again. Try telling yourself 鈥業 can鈥 rather than 鈥業 can鈥檛鈥. It鈥檚 a way of thinking that takes practice but can make you feel much more positive in new situations.
It鈥檚 important to take small risks and give things a go 鈥 even if you feel a bit nervous. Whenever you think that you can鈥檛 do something, try to push yourself just a little and give it a shot anyway. You don鈥檛 have to be perfect at everything, and hey, if the fear of being embarrassed is the only thing holding you back, is it really worth it?
When we鈥檙e going through puberty, it鈥檚 not just what we do that can feel embarrassing, but also what鈥檚 happening to our bodies, thoughts and feelings. Always remember that lots of other people are going through what you鈥檙e going through (or they will or they have done) 鈥 and have probably felt just as weird about it as you. You鈥檙e not on your own and what鈥檚 happening to your body and your brain is completely normal, so try not to let it hold you back.
Remember, getting embarrassed isn鈥檛 the end of the world, and people won鈥檛 remember it forever. Keep your sense of humour. OK, you can鈥檛 laugh and joke your way through every awkward moment in life, but if something cringey happens, try and laugh it off. Laughing at yourself is a great way of relieving tension 鈥 in yourself and others.
Finally, we all get embarrassed from time to time - that鈥檚 normal. But remember, with a bit of practice we can learn to overcome it, so it doesn鈥檛 stop us from enjoying life and doing all the things we like or want to do.
For information about organisations which can offer more advice on a range of issues, check out the advice helplines page.
You can also get loads more clips and tips on all kinds of emotions by checking out the Lifebabble guide to feeling good.