麻豆社

Joe and Eddie are pasteurising the Tumble Tussock cider in the bath at Grange Farm. After last year they make sure it doesn't overflow. Eddie reckons they have a liquid gold mine on their hands.

The Village Hall plays host to the worst pantomime rehearsal yet. Eddie thinks it's absolutely hilarious to wind up Neil (playing King Clarence) by calling him "Clarrie darling". And Alan has to reprimand him for slipping in product placement for turkeys and cider. Then Susan starts making references to kefir. Susan's still arguing with Usha about costumes - nothing comes up to her high standards. Lynda is determined to alter the script to give her character more depth. She's decided that "Fairy Nightshade" doesn't have the rhythm she's looking for, and would rather be "Carabosse".

When Jazzer takes a cigarette break and misses his cue, Alan finally snaps. He stops the rehearsal and orders the whole cast to go home and just learn the lines as written. They'd better arrive at the next rehearsal prepared to be more mature. His forcefulness impresses Usha, but Alan worries he's gone too far. After that will anyone even show up on Wednesday?