麻豆社

鈥淪tressful. Very, very stressful鈥�. That鈥檚 what the commentator said during the England match last night. But, I wondered who he was referring to. The players looked OK - hard-working, disciplined and determined, but my heart was racing, my stomach felt rubbish, and (a bit like some recent dental treatment I had) I just wanted it to end. It isn鈥檛 easy being a spectator at times like this.

Powerful emotions all around the country as the seconds ticked away. But, isn鈥檛 it funny how those tense nervous headaches, the knots in the stomach, the sheer fear explodes so suddenly into joy and celebration and relief? All the angst gets forgotten in an instant. The pain evaporates in a blast of adrenalin. It鈥檚 just brilliant.

I remember the manager Gareth Southgate once saying: 鈥淲e always have to believe in what is possible in life and not be hindered by history or expectations.鈥� And, after 55 years of disappointment, his team managed both to ignore a history most of them can鈥檛 remember and not be over-awed by the expectations of a hungry nation. The key, he says, is character - character forged by absorbing all that鈥檚 thrown at them, but not being defeated by it. It鈥檚 quite an achievement - and we haven鈥檛 even won anything yet.

Yet, Gareth Southgate鈥檚 observation - and isn鈥檛 he the model of a confident humility? - triggered in my own mind a line uttered by an elderly German theologian who, referring to another crowd of hopeful, often-disappointed dreamers, said that 鈥減rophets don鈥檛 foresee realities; they anticipate possibilities.鈥� In other words, there are no guarantees about the future, but it鈥檚 all there for the taking. To use two other words heard a lot last night, you can only approach the uncertain future with resilience and creativity. We absorb the wounds of past experience, but we don鈥檛 have to be defined by them.

I don鈥檛 know if football really is coming home - we have to wait until Sunday night and the Italians to know that. But, if football is about passion, love, hope, longing, struggling - physical and mental fight - then it鈥檚 already home. Because that鈥檚 what this week and last night have proved as the emotional rollercoaster has been ridden to breaking point. And there鈥檚 more to come.

I don鈥檛 know how I鈥檓 going to manage the final on Sunday. Probably with a copy of the Psalms on my knee - that wonderful collection of poems in which everything is given expression 鈥� from the depths of misery to the heights of promise.

On the other hand, I might use the opportunity to learn to pray better.

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