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Good morning. It’s Tuesday the 20th September. Normal life resumes today, and I’m glad that is so, some ancient civilisations went into mourning for months or even years when their rulers died.

But our rituals today usually provide a brisk response to death. It is right that our ceremonies are solemn and deeply sad but we should not put our lives on hold indefinitely. We must turn back to the task of living, grieved and shaken as we may be. This is especially hard for those who are personally bereaved, who may have been buoyed up by the drama of death and suddenly find, after the funeral, that they are confronting a huge emptiness. Yet life goes on with its tasks and responsibilities. We must go on, ready or not.

One of the prayers often spoken at a funeral is that we might be granted ‘the wisdom and the grace to use aright the time that is left to us here on earth’. King Charles echoed that prayer in an address last week, aware as he is, that at 73 – well past retirement age - that his reign will not be as long as his mother’s.

How we ‘use aright the time that is left to us’ is a sobering question. It is not just about creating a bucket list of gratifying experiences we hope to enjoy before we die. It’s about something richer and more profound. How do we make something of what life has given to us? To face that question honestly involves rising above the clamour of the ego: the me, me, me, me first, me too, the fog of self-absorption that permeates our psychic landscape. Especially in our richer western nations where we put so much stress on discovering our authentic selves, fulfilling our personal desire and gratifying our particular passions. There was no egoism in yesterday’s funeral, no eulogies – they had all been said. The focus was on scripture, prayer, God.

What made the late Queen so remarkable, so ‘royal’ was that she had her ego firmly in check. Not repressed, she was never a mere cipher, but I think she had the knack of sifting her spontaneous feelings so that her constant public interactions were never all about her. I don’t think this could have come overnight. She had an inner attentiveness, a spiritual discipline, based on the Gospels and the teaching of Christ. That’s why so many who met her felt special, felt blessed. What a gift we could all be to others if we too had ‘the wisdom and the grace to use aright the time that is left to us here on earth’.

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