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There’ve been contrasting weeks for our two heroes. It’s a non-stop all anecdote premiere for Elis. For he has as follows… met Hugh Grant, attended Ken Clarke’s curry house, been to film screenings and had his greatest ever stag - apart from the one organised by John he stresses. *And* Mo Salah thinks he matters.

John meanwhile has been asleep for half nine each night, talked about trauma and bought two sheds.

We also have a guest who is perhaps the biggest mover and shaker in South Gloucestershire and also makes money out of small bowls of chips. Plus there are some incredible skiving emails.