#502 - Cheating Shoes, A 46% Complaint Ratio and New Year Old John
An attempted new year鈥檚 resolution meant the odd tear was shed for John, and now he鈥檚 in hell. But he does have the cleanest crotch in show business.
It may be a new year, but it鈥檚 an old John we find on today鈥檚 podcast. An attempted new year鈥檚 resolution meant the odd tear was shed, and now he鈥檚 in hell. But it鈥檚 not all bad, because he does have the cleanest crotch in show business thanks to a hand sanitiser mishap.
Spirits get lifted by a visit from our in-house statistician, our very own Andy Zaltzman, Statman Ross. He reveals that John鈥檚 Made Up Game stats are akin to those of Roger Federer, and there鈥檚 confirmation that Elis can certainly go down as one of the big 4 MUG winners of his generation. An aural heat map is drawn up of Elis鈥檚 connecting hotspots, and some geographical blind spots present themselves.
Elsewhere there are celeb call centre tales, and Dave sheds light on his brief stint as a professional Mario Kart racer.
Do you have some correspondence to lift John out of hell? Send them to elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk or WhatsApp 07974 293 022.
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