 |
Divorce and Things ...
Writer, Diane Messias, steps into dangerous waters as she ponders the etiquette of dividing the spoils after a divorce...
I split from my husband earlier this year and I’ve had to equip my new home with all the luxuries we’ve come to expect as necessities. What an eye opener! You see, I’m between divorces at the moment, and as this was a second marriage for both of us, everyone assumed we had everything we needed from the first time around. Except that I left all the chattels with my first husband and Husband Number Two’s Wife’s Number One took literally half of everything when they broke up - including lids of casserole dishes, strangely; thank goodness they hadn’t had a cat - anyway, we were left with a motley selection of household goods from the Dark Ages, and you sort of get used to managing …
But that’s not to say it’s been an easy transition. It was quite poignant standing in the family house before we sold it, gazing around at the mementos of ten year together; a wry smile at the Egyptian vase we bartered for in Cairo, succeeding, in the space of a mere few minutes, to push up the price by three hundred per cent. And of course, due to paternal rights, I’m not able to watch my son asleep every night in his disused beaver enclosure. Still, at least I’ve come out of it all with my favourite vegetable knife ….
… which comes in very handy for dinner parties. Only, who gets custody of the dinner party guests? I mean, is it socially correct to invite Fluffy and Buffy over if Buffy had a manly drink with the ex only yesterday?
Interestingly, there’s not a problem with other people’s dinner parties - because you just don’t get invited to those any more. I’m considering buying one of those inflatable men who sit beside women who drive alone, and sticking him on the vacant dinner table seat next to me. It would beat the hell out of sitting next to some old bore and if he made a grab for me, I could literally deflate him.Ìý At least I’d get back onto the guest list.
I’m off to track down an Over-The-Door-Hamper - Oh, did I tell you my new place has got doors?…
Have you or someone close to you survived the confusion of divorce or the splitting up of a long-term relationship?
How did you deal with dividing up the home, friends, pets?
In between the emotional headaches, what were the funnier moments of setting up a separate life?
Ìý |
|
