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Good morning. The average UK family spends just six hours a week together and only eats a meal as a household on four days out of seven. This was the conclusion of research carried out earlier this year by a well-known food brand. Nearly half of the respondents blamed distractions such as television and game consoles for impacting on their quality time together. It seems that communication with those we love is more of a challenge than ever. Today, the Fast of Av, is the saddest day on the Jewish calendar. It is the anniversary of numerous tragedies, including the expulsion of the Jews from England in 1290, from France in 1306 and from Spain in 1492, and on this day in 1941, the Nazis formally adopted the terms of the ‘Final Solution. But, most significantly, today is the anniversary of the destruction of both Temples in Jerusalem. In the aftermath, our sages determined that Synagogues would take over as the central place of worship and the dinner table, the setting for blessings and social interaction, would take the place of the altar. To this day, the ritual washing of hands before meals and the adding of salt to bread, remind us of the connection between the altar in the Temple and family mealtime. The simple act of eating together around the same table, free from distractions, provides the essential setting for family members to learn how to communicate constructively with those they love, how to listen well and, most importantly, how to disagree respectfully. And, I believe, that this is the prime reason why our dinner tables are sacred. The first century historian, Flavius Josephus, recorded how the defence of Jerusalem was mortally weakened by internal division and destructive conflict. The Temple was destroyed because of a failure to unite for the greater good at the moment of greatest peril. At a time when we’re witnessing a worrying global increase of deep social and political polarisation, lessons learned around our dinner tables can be the building blocks of a society that understands that disagreeing well begins with communicating well. Engaging with respect, regardless of how strongly one disagrees, is known in Jewish tradition as an ‘argument for the sake of Heaven’. This is why the current deep political fissures in Israel cause profound pain to Jewish people around the world. On this Fast of Av, when we remember the unbearable price of discord, there is an urgent need for constructive engagement and the capacity to disagree peacefully and responsibly. After all, the protestors on each side of the febrile political debate, all march under the same flag. The timeless lessons of history are more relevant today than ever.
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